Originally authored by Nathalie Fisher at Ms. Career Girl Blog
You get nervous in interviews, and you know that it’s normal, but you wish you could just go in and not have to worry about whether they like you or not. You want to just give your answers and be confident that things will work out in your favor.
Interviews are high-pressure situations, and when we find ourselves here, our brains automatically go into panic mode because we want it to go well. We want them to like us, we want them to remember us, and we want to impress them, so they will hire us instead of the other five people they’re also interviewed. We put a lot of pressure on ourselves to do well, and we feel it’s personal if they don’t hire us.
I am interviewer and Hiring Manager myself, and I’m going to share in this post some of the best advice you’ll receive for when you’re out there, interviewing for jobs. I can tell you that we don’t want you to just say what we want to hear so you can get the job, and that’s normally what most candidates are trying to do.
The point of the interview for us is to learn who you really are, so we can accurately assess whether you’re honestly the right fit or not for the organization and for the particular role. If you’re not the right fit, it’s better for both of us if we don’t hire you. Plus, when candidates are just saying what we want to hear, we can tell.
Whether or not you are chosen, it’s not personal.
As much as you think it is, it’s actually not a reflection of you. It’s a reflection of the interviewer, of their organization, and of the role itself. Sometimes it really has nothing to do with you. It can have to do with internal changes, anything from law suites internally, to a family thing, where perhaps the CEO’s son got the job, or they re-structured and no longer needed to hire for the position. So, with that in mind…
The best way to feel calm and confident in an interview is to make a decision to go in with a certain attitude: one that exudes confidence.
The attitude I’m referring to is that of High intention/Low attachment.
That means that you have a clear intention to do your very best, and that means you prepare well–because preparation is the antidote to fear.
On the other hand, it also means that you are not attached to the outcome. If you do get the offer, great. If you don’t get the job, equally great.
The truth is you never know what can happen. If you practice effective follow-up, you can stay on the company’s radar, and even a year later, you may be offered a position that’s even better than the one you originally sought out. This has happened to my clients in the past. Having an emotional attachment to an opportunity is what puts us into a noticeably nervous state in the first place.
Think about it this way: You have nothing to lose.
You didn’t have the job walking in, so if you don’t end up with the job, you haven’t lost anything, you’ve only gained.
You’ve gained interview experience.
You’ve gained a valuable networking connection and potential for a later opportunity.
And you’ve gained knowledge about the company and the role.
You haven’t lost anything because you can’t lose something you never had in the first place.
You may never be completely 100% ready, but you can be very well prepared.
When you prepare, you feel confident.
When you prepare, you are able to articulate more clearly and precisely.
And when you have done your best and you’re not attached to the outcome, you can leave room for the magic to happen.
So, when going into your next job interview, make sure that you are well prepared, and go in with a high intention/low attachment attitude. This will change the way you show up. You’ll perform better and be more relaxed because remember, you can’t lose something you never had in the first place.